Laugh or cry, must I Choose?

 I am by nature, the proverbial “Susie Sunshine”, but just because I enjoy and find joy in life, doesn’t mean that I don’t feel fear, grief, anger and sadness as well. I did however believe that you should keep all these things hidden as much as possible from the rest of the world. My motto was, “Laugh and the world laughs with you, Cry and you cry alone!” This was my motto for most of my life and I truly believed it for the longest time. That if I allowed myself to be seen as anything other than “Susie Sunshine”, that no one would want to be around me. They would not want to be my friend. I have learned that this (laugh the world will laugh with you, but if you cry you will cry alone) is not always   true, how wrong I was! There is usually at least, one true friend that will hold your hand and cry with you. There are people who will walk away, but the ones who really matter will sit with you and hold your hand.  They’ll cry with you and find ways to make you laugh. The ones who really count are always there no matter what, and after a while will simply tell you to get over it and help you find a way to do it. This doesn’t mean that I should spend all my life crying and whining, but it does mean that I don’t have to hide my real feelings behind a mask anymore either. And while I am learning every day to release those negative emotions, I know that if I have them I don’t have to bury them deep inside and hide them either. I need to let them out into the light and let them go. This has been and is perhaps one of the hardest lessons for me. So here I am a work in progress, a slightly better balanced “Susie Sunshine” wishing all of you a day of joy and light!